Sunday, August 24, 2008 @ 9:20 PM
shucks.
& i just realised something.
-stop lying to me-
i thought all have gone better,
but it's still i thought.
yes, she's always been on your mind.
even if you say she's not,
even if you do not show,
even you two may seem unknown,
but who knows behind closed doors?
to you, i'm better off missing in this world.
so that you can go ahead after her,
without hearing a shatter of my heart,
nor cries that you'll find.
you're hoping that my heart will dissolve,
it's just a matter of time you may think.
to receive a reply that my heart still sticks,
you hope that you're being deceived.
yes, she's far off better than me.
but at least give me a fair treat.
to show you that i'm also fit to be.
wait, you said.
followed by a saddening forget it.
i can remember.
the promises you gave.
to get yourself out of this,
you act like you've forgotten everything.
to make a bad impression of you in me,
& the purpose is always it.
you always say she's not.
but come on,
your actions proved it.
or maybe i misinterpret.
you can sacrifice yourself to talk to me,
for the sake of having her smile.
but i can tell you this,
it's the treatment you gave,
that led to the unhappiness in we.
you mean now you're gonna treat us fairly,
to make her happy?
no, you're too naive.
i know she's avoiding.
cos she still wants her friendship.
but you're pursuing.
cos you feel you can succeed,
but in the consideration of me.
& this makes me a devil,
who's stopping you two from matching.
you think i like seeing you ignore me?
it breaks my heart even more.
the everyday we meet,
silence to describe it.
still, i carry the hope when we meet,
something good may change part of it,
slowly,
whole of it.
that's why you see me.
i'm tired of this.
so sick of this.
i wanted to stop myself from sinking deep,
unwillingly.
but i'm always being held back.
both are the reasons,
cant bear to,
cant do it.
i tried.
hard.
but failed.
if there are 10000000 methods to it,
i can tell you.
i've tried 9999999 of it.
all along it was wrong.
it shouldnt have started.
she's part of how we started.
& she's part of how we stopped.
it's too late to regret now.
we cant continue anymore,
& we wont.
you wished to say,
i know.
still, i want to hear it from you.
yes, it'll break my wounded heart again,
but think of it.
you two can go,
what you're hoping for.
i know you'll see this.
i know you will.
or am i thinking too much?
hohoho.
lucky never stay at home ytd. wahaha. LOL. today damn sian lor. nth to do. olympics ended wor! sadded. no more lindan. ): no more zhang ning, no more marissa, no more ponsana, LOL.
oh yea, & i found this website fun hor!
check it out!
www.irritatingblogger.blogspot.com
JIAYOUS!
JANET! :D